Relationships in a World of Individualism

  • rWorld

    The rWorld is about more than Dale Kuehne's book Sex and the iWorld.
    The rWorld is a New England based, non-profit (in formation), that is composed of a growing number of people and organizations from many faith and ideological backgrounds worldwide. We believe that much of the fulfillment for which women and men are looking can be found by enhancing the quality of our relationships. While the individual freedom we enjoy in the West is a gift, the love and intimacy for which humans yearn will not be found in self-serving materialism or hedonism, but in a variety of healthy relationships.

    Contact us if you'd like get involved:

  • Dale Kuehne

    Sex & the iWorld

    Professor of Politics and The Richard L. Bready Chair for Ethics, Economics, and the Common Good at Saint Anselm College, Manchester, NH.

    In this blog I'm highlighting signposts of the world in which we presently reside as a means of helping promote a civil, and meaningful dialogue about what kind of world in which we wish to live. I am particularly interested in exploring how might we reconcile the individual good and the common good, and where reconciliation isn’t possible, which should take precedence and why.

    I also blog at

    [Content Caution]

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Marriage: Can We All Get Along?

Posted by Dale Kuehne on May 1, 2012

Washington is rightly criticized for our political leaders not coming together to find ways to work together to address the problems that confront us all.

As citizens we tell pollsters we are disgusted with Congress, and its approval ratings are veering toward single digits and are at historic lows.

In Britain, people who believe in marriage but disagree on its definition have come together to make a statement about the central importance of marriage.

Do we have the courage to do the same in America?

I have published at length on why I believe marriage should be between one man and one woman. My convictions on this issue are unchanged and as I have done further research I have felt increasingly persuaded of the importance of defining marriage accordingly. But I would willingly join those who disagree with me about the definition of marriage, yet agree on its importance. Will anyone join me?

I know there will be many who will disagree with me, especially in jurisdictions where the definition of marriage remains unchanged but is being challenged.

Making a case and taking a stand for the definition of marriage is important.

But, as we speak, the institution of marriage is imploding in Western Civilization. 45% of American Children are born outside of marriage, and for the first time a majority of people under the age of 30 are not married. It is my conviction that the reason the definition of marriage is becoming so fluid is because we as a society are losing faith in the institution. Cohabitation is the new “marriage.”

If I am right, we will only be able to engage our society in a serious discussion about the nature and definition of marriage, once we have recovered a conviction of its importance.

Western civilization will not end if people who disagree on some issues can come together on others.

It will not survive if we cannot.

If we’ve lost the ability to transcend partisanship when possible, we have lost the means to preserve freedom.

You, you think it’s cool to be crazy
I say you’re born rich – stay rich
There’s no point in taking chances.
And me, I wouldn’t call it a sophomore slump, no, I’d say
I’m one step closer to bein’ just where I want to be

Away from this scene,
Away from this machine


Meet me in the middle,
Well c’mon let’s make up a dance
And we’ll agree to call it the compromise

Step one: find a partner, grab a pen
And don’t you dare ask questions,
Just sign on the dotted line
Step two: throw your partner behind a desk
Will then do absolutely nothing
So it’s your job to dance and smile the whole time

Don’t call it a trend,
’cause it’s the only way we think to get ahead

Meet me in the middle
Well c’mon let’s make up a dance
And we’ll agree to call it the compromise

There’s no sense in complainin’
If it doesn’t change your minds
Take me by the hand, let’s compromise

I can feel your feet touchin’ mine
If you can’t dance, there’s someone else in line

Meet me in the middle,
Well c’mon let’s make up a dance
And we’ll agree to call it the compromise

There’s no sense in complainin’
If it doesn’t change your minds
Take me by the hand, let’s compromise

The Compromise by The Format from Dog Problems (2006)


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