Signpostings

Relationships in a World of Individualism

  • rWorld

    The rWorld is about more than Dale Kuehne's book Sex and the iWorld.
    The rWorld is a New England based, non-profit (in formation), that is composed of a growing number of people and organizations from many faith and ideological backgrounds worldwide. We believe that much of the fulfillment for which women and men are looking can be found by enhancing the quality of our relationships. While the individual freedom we enjoy in the West is a gift, the love and intimacy for which humans yearn will not be found in self-serving materialism or hedonism, but in a variety of healthy relationships.

    Contact us if you'd like get involved:
    scr.im/rwld

  • Dale Kuehne

    Sex & the iWorld

    Professor of Politics and The Richard L. Bready Chair for Ethics, Economics, and the Common Good at Saint Anselm College, Manchester, NH.

    In this blog I'm highlighting signposts of the world in which we presently reside as a means of helping promote a civil, and meaningful dialogue about what kind of world in which we wish to live. I am particularly interested in exploring how might we reconcile the individual good and the common good, and where reconciliation isn’t possible, which should take precedence and why.

    I also blog at Sharewik.com

    [Content Caution]

Archive for the ‘iWorld’ Category

The Trajectory of Loneliness (Take 2)

Posted by dalekuehne on May 15, 2012

While few of us want to be confronted with the need for politics, politics essentially defines how we as a nation understand ourselves, and the role of government in promoting the good life. The narrative of both political parties is largely individualistic. Here is an editorial about “Julia” a life narrative put out by the Obama campaign.

Some will want to give a partisan reading to this Signposting, but doing so would miss the point. Campaigns are run by the most sophisticated advertising consultants in the world. Campaigns offer a reflection of who we are as a people. I merely want us to reflect on what both campaigns tell us about who we are and what we value. Elections are won and lost by capturing independent voters in the middle. Both campaigns are targeting them. How campaigns “message” speaks volumes about our current cultural narrative.

http://blog.christianitytoday.com/women/2012/05/im_not_julia_why_obamas_americ.html?utm_source=ctdirect-html&utm_medium=Newsletter&utm_term=9458236&utm_content=125865112&utm_campaign=2012


Ooh there’s somethin about just somethin about the way she’s move
And I can’t figure it out
there’s something about her.
Said ooh it’s somethin about kinda woman that want you but don’t need you
And I can’t figure it out
it’s somethin about her
Cause she walk like a boss talk like a boss
Manicured nailed to set the pedicure off
She’s fly effortlessly
Cause she move like a boss do what a boss
Do she got me thinkin about gettin involved
That’s the kinda girl I need

She got her own thing
that’s why I love her
Miss Independent
Won’t you come and spend a little time
She got her own thing that’s why I love her
Miss Independent
ooh the way you shine
Miss Independent
yeah yeah, yeah yeah, yeah yeah, yeah yeah, yeah yeah, yeah yeah, yeah

Ooh there’s somethin about
kinda woman that can do for herself
I look at her and it makes me proud
There’s something about her
Somethin oh so sexy about
kinda woman that don’t even need my help
She said she got it she got it
No doubt, it’s somethin about her
Cause she work like a boss play like a boss
Car and a crib she bouta pay em both off
And the bills are paid on time yeah
She made for a boss only a boss
Anything less she telling them to get lost
That’s the girl that’s on my mind

She got her own thing
that’s why I love her
Miss Independent
Won’t you come and spend a little time
She got her own thing that’s why I love her
Miss Independent
ooh the way you shine
Miss Independent
yeah yeah, yeah yeah, yeah yeah, yeah yeah, yeah yeah, yeah yeah, yeah

Her favorite thing to say Don’t worry I got it
And everything she got best believe she bought it
She gonna steal ma heart ain’t no doubt about it
You’re everything I need, said you’re everything I need
yeah yeah, yeah yeah, yeah yeah, yeah yeah, yeah yeah, yeah yeah yeah

She got her own thing
that’s why I love her
Miss Independent
Won’t you come and spend a little time
She got her own thing that’s why I love her
Miss Independent
ooh the way you shine
Miss Independent
yeah yeah, yeah yeah, yeah yeah, yeah yeah, yeah yeah, yeah yeah, yeah
Miss Independent
That’s why I love her

Miss Independent by Ne-Yo from Year of the Gentleman (2008)

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The Trajectory of Loneliness

Posted by dalekuehne on May 14, 2012

Why, despite all of the evidence that we are becoming more isolated and lonely, do we continue in the trajectory of loneliness?

http://www.theatlantic.com/magazine/archive/2012/05/is-facebook-making-us-lonely/8930/

2am; where do I begin,
Crying off my face again.
The silent sound of loneliness
Wants to follow me to bed.

I’m a ghost of a girl that I want to be most.
I’m the shell of a girl that I used to know well.

Dancing slowly in an empty room,
Can the lonely take the place of you?
I sing myself a quiet lullaby.
Let you go and let the lonely in
To take my heart again.

Too afraid to go inside
For the pain of one more loveless night.
But the loneliness will stay with me
And hold me til I fall asleep.

I’m a ghost of a girl that I want to be most.
I’m the shell of a girl that I used to know well.

Dancing slowly in an empty room,
Can the lonely take the place of you?
I sing myself a quiet lullaby.
Let you go and let the lonely in
To take my heart again.

Broken pieces of
A barely breathing story
Where there once was love
Now there’s only me and the lonely.

Dancing slowly in an empty room
Can the lonely take the place of you?
I sing myself a quiet lullaby
Let you go and let the lonely in
To take my heart again.

The Lonely by Christina Perri from Lovestrong (2011)

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The Prank to End All Pranks

Posted by dalekuehne on May 7, 2012

Robert Fulgum learned all he needed to know in Kindergarten. I learned the basics of International Politics in a college dorm filled with over 500 freshman. Here is my latest sharewik blog: The Prank to End All Pranks.

http://www.sharewik.com/blogs/1634186

Don’t you ever wonder what
Will happen when it ends?
How can we let go of the,
The ones who we call friends?
And I know it’s only a story but
For so many it’s more than that.
It’s a world all on it’s own where we
Want to put on that sorting hat.

And I will miss the train ride in
And the pranks pulled by the twins.
And though it’s nowhere I have been,
I’ll keep on smiling from the times I had with them.

Could there ever be again
Another one like this?
One that’s brought us together and
Started its own music movement?

And I will miss the train ride in
And the pranks pulled by the twins.
And though it’s nowhere I have been,
I’ll keep on smiling from the times I had with them.

Soon we will see it closed.
The final chapter exposed.
It’s an end of an era
And I’m seeing clearer
That nothing will ever be the same.

And I will miss the train ride in
And the pranks pulled by the twins.
And though it’s nowhere I have been,
I’ll keep on smiling from the times I had with them.

End of an Era by Oliver Boyd and the Remembralls from Back for the Fight (2007)

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Educational Blockade: New York Style

Posted by dalekuehne on May 3, 2012

One of the most important tasks of a nation is the education of our children. In this Signposting we look at a sobering critique of American education by former New York City educational Chancellor Joel Klein. We must take stock of the problem in order to find a way forward.

(Our next Signposting highlights a promising educational development)

http://www.theatlantic.com/magazine/archive/2011/06/the-failure-of-american-schools/8497/

I’m questioning my education
Is my education who I am now?
While you’re deciding, I’ve been finding
Looking around in the here and now.

If I’ve been taught from the beginning
Would my fears now by winning?

I’m questioning my own equation
Is my own equation relevant somehow?
The flags are waving, the news is breaking
See the man who can’t pick out his own tie

If I’ve been taught from the beginning
Would my fears now be winning?
A wild world, figuring out the answers
I’ll be in my own dance and I, I, yeah, I, I….

I’m questioning my education
Rewind and what does it show?
Could be, the truth it becomes you
I’m a seed, wondering why it grows


Education by Pearl Jam from Lost Dogs (2003)

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Marriage: Can We All Get Along?

Posted by dalekuehne on May 1, 2012

Washington is rightly criticized for our political leaders not coming together to find ways to work together to address the problems that confront us all.

As citizens we tell pollsters we are disgusted with Congress, and its approval ratings are veering toward single digits and are at historic lows.

In Britain, people who believe in marriage but disagree on its definition have come together to make a statement about the central importance of marriage.

http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/education-17906017

Do we have the courage to do the same in America?

I have published at length on why I believe marriage should be between one man and one woman. My convictions on this issue are unchanged and as I have done further research I have felt increasingly persuaded of the importance of defining marriage accordingly. But I would willingly join those who disagree with me about the definition of marriage, yet agree on its importance. Will anyone join me?

I know there will be many who will disagree with me, especially in jurisdictions where the definition of marriage remains unchanged but is being challenged.

Making a case and taking a stand for the definition of marriage is important.

But, as we speak, the institution of marriage is imploding in Western Civilization. 45% of American Children are born outside of marriage, and for the first time a majority of people under the age of 30 are not married. It is my conviction that the reason the definition of marriage is becoming so fluid is because we as a society are losing faith in the institution. Cohabitation is the new “marriage.”

If I am right, we will only be able to engage our society in a serious discussion about the nature and definition of marriage, once we have recovered a conviction of its importance.

Western civilization will not end if people who disagree on some issues can come together on others.

It will not survive if we cannot.

If we’ve lost the ability to transcend partisanship when possible, we have lost the means to preserve freedom.

You, you think it’s cool to be crazy
I say you’re born rich – stay rich
There’s no point in taking chances.
And me, I wouldn’t call it a sophomore slump, no, I’d say
I’m one step closer to bein’ just where I want to be

Away from this scene,
Away from this machine

Alright!

Meet me in the middle,
Well c’mon let’s make up a dance
And we’ll agree to call it the compromise

Step one: find a partner, grab a pen
And don’t you dare ask questions,
Just sign on the dotted line
Step two: throw your partner behind a desk
Will then do absolutely nothing
So it’s your job to dance and smile the whole time

Don’t call it a trend,
’cause it’s the only way we think to get ahead

Meet me in the middle
Well c’mon let’s make up a dance
And we’ll agree to call it the compromise

There’s no sense in complainin’
If it doesn’t change your minds
Take me by the hand, let’s compromise

I can feel your feet touchin’ mine
If you can’t dance, there’s someone else in line

Meet me in the middle,
Well c’mon let’s make up a dance
And we’ll agree to call it the compromise

There’s no sense in complainin’
If it doesn’t change your minds
Take me by the hand, let’s compromise

The Compromise by The Format from Dog Problems (2006)

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See No Person, Hear No Person, Feel No Person: Relationships in Technoworld

Posted by dalekuehne on April 30, 2012

See no person, hear no person, feel no person. Living in the relational desert of the self.

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/sciencetech/article-2137152/Lonely-life-techno-addict-thousands-48-hours-speaking-human.html

See Me
Feel Me
Touch Me
Heal Me

See Me
Feel Me
Touch Me
Heal Me

See Me Feel Me
Touch Me
Heal Me

Listening to you, I get the music
Gazing at you, I get the heat
Following you, I climb the mountain
I get excitement at your feet

Right behind you, I see the millions
On you, I see the glory
From you, I get opinion
From you, I get the story

Listening to you, I get the music
Gazing at you, I get the heat
Following you, I climb the mountain
I get excitement at your feet

Right behind you, I see the millions
On you, I see the glory
From you, I get opinion
From you, I get the story


See Me, Feel Me by Pete Townshend from Tommy by The Who (1969)

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Adult Friendship: Shades of Adolescence

Posted by dalekuehne on April 27, 2012

Relational awkwardness following us from adolescence to adulthood.

http://www.boston.com/community/moms/blogs/24_hour_workday/2012/04/making-friends-as-an-adult.html?p1=Well_MostPop_Emailed2

Friendship is rare,
Do you know what I’m sayin’ to you?
Friendship is rare.
My derriere,
When you find out much later
That they don’t really care.
It’s rare to me, can’t you see?
It’s rare to me, can’t you see?

Friendship by Tenacious D from self-titled CD (2001)

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The Truth Will Set Us Free: Take 1 (with a Valium)

Posted by dalekuehne on April 24, 2012

The book of Hebrews opens with a statement that lies at the foundation of life:

Faith is being sure of what we hope for and certain of what we do not see.

People often tell me they will start reading Signpostings when I become more focused on good news than bad news.

The attached article is a description of the declining faith of Americans in each other.

This appears to be bad news, which it is, but it is rooted in good news. The good news is that there is a way forward for ourselves and for the nation. It does not rest primarily with our political or religious leaders.

It never has.

It rests with us.

What needs to be done cannot be done alone. It can only be done with each other.

Are we willing to take the responsibility to begin to work with each other and walk toward greater peace and justice?

The rWorld (the relational world) is the future. It is the only way forward. It always has been.

The truth is the first step to freedom.

http://www.nationaljournal.com/features/restoration-calls/in-nothing-we-trust-20120419?print=true

The war is not over, no battle have we won–beneath the layers of lies we live–i suffer by my own hands–but i am to blind to See–behind closed doors the government hides me–i am silence, society is sickened–the naked truth, show yourself to me–the Naked truth, the eternal cover up–believe in me, for you have no other choice–for i have no race, color or greed–for in Nothing, in nothing we trust–for in nothing we trust–i suffer by my own hands–but i am to blind to see–but i am to blind to See–the war is over, the government hides me–as i am silenced, society is sickened–the naked truth, show yourself to me–the Naked truth, the eternal cover up–believe in me for you have no other choice–for i have no race, color or greed–for in Nothing, in nothing we trust–for in nothing, in nothing we trust.

In Nothing We Trust by Morta Skuld from Surface (1997)

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Child Trafficking American Style

Posted by dalekuehne on April 20, 2012

So much for Social Darwininsm. Natural Selection replaced by unnatural selection.

http://www.nationalpost.com/todays-paper/clinic+advertises+selection+paper/6475952/story.html

Close your eyes,
Have no fear,
The monsters gone,
He’s on the run and your daddy’s here,

Beautiful,
Beautiful, beautiful,
Beautiful Boy,

Before you go to sleep,
Say a little prayer,
Every day in every way,
It’s getting better and better,

Beautiful,
Beautiful, beautiful,
Beautiful Boy,

Out on the ocean sailing away,
I can hardly wait,
To see you to come of age,
But I guess we’ll both,
Just have to be patient,
Yes it’s a long way to go,
But in the meantime,

Before you cross the street,
Take my hand,
Life is just what happens to you,
While your busy making other plans,

Beautiful,
Beautiful, beautiful,
Beautiful Boy,
Darling,
Darling,
Darling Sean.

Beautiful Boy by John Lennon from Double Fantasy (1980)

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The Demise of the American Dream, Take 1: Educational Debt

Posted by dalekuehne on April 19, 2012

Educational loans and the long-term social and relational implications.

http://online.wsj.com/article/SB10001424052702304818404577350030559887086.html

Hallelujah

Now I lay, I lay me down to sleep
Hallelujah
Almighty dollar
I praise the lord afford my roll to keep
Hallelujah
Almighty dollar

Money
I need more money
Just a little more money
Yeah, I need more money
Money, money
I need more money
I need more money
Just a little more money
Just a little more money
Yeah, I need more money
Yeah, I need more money

And give us these days
Our daily bread
Only you we praise
Almighty dollar

Money
My personal saviour
Money
A material lust
Money
Life’s only treasure
Money
In God we trust

And if I should die before I wake
Hallelujah
Almight dollar
I’m gonna take the money that I make
Hallelujah
Almighty dollar

Money
I need more money
Just a little more money
Yeah, I need more money
Money, money
I need more money
I need more money
Just a little more money
Just a little more money
Yeah, I need more money
Yeah, I need more money

And give us these days
Our daily bread
Only you we praise
Almighty dollar

Money
My personal saviour
Money
A material lust
Money
Life’s only treasure
Money
In God we trust

Money by Extreme from Pornograffitti (1990)

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